In my journey to be in the center
I remember looking back on the
past where I never imagined a life praised in royalty
Self-conscious to push forward
Too afraid to lose those closest to me
I knew there was more to life than existing
I changed for the “better”
To up my value I treated those as lesser
Respect was what I’ve gained but somehow the insecurities remained inside me
To be the center stage
I would be praised
Then my problems would “go away”
Never knew this pressure could feel so unrealistic
Sleepless nights
Days where I went on starving myself to get to where I wanted to be
Yet through it all, I somehow couldn’t come to my senses that this was twisted
To gain the world
To gain the love I truly deserved
To gain the ultimate respect
I would lose my soul for it

©Anton K. D’Niage

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